What DID Lord Arrowby Say? «

What DID Lord Arrowby Say?

Thursday 19th January 2012

You’ve been waiting 19 days now. It’s intolerable. Lord Arrowby has been my part-time love-interest for 15 years. We’re ideally suited, both Poor Little Rich Gays, therefore consumed primarily with buying art works and our high callings, his to run the country (from behind the scenes), mine to wear clothes and to re-fire the life with words. We must be able to go shopping without notice. We’re both very clear about that. We couldn’t bear a boyf clinging on for dear life.

At Reggie Cresswell’s New Year’s Eve Party, I said to Lord Arrowby, ‘You’re wearing make-up.’ ‘No, I’m not; it’s weariness.’ He was snappy, of course, as you might expect when Government quarters are accused of powdering and painting. But the tiniest tragic wing brushed over him. He’s given everything to our Nation and high achievement. ‘Poor Lord,’ I said, feeling terribly his lonely path.

Would love and affection soothe? ‘Let’s get married,’ I said. Do you know what? You won’t believe it. Usually he hisses and spits when I propose our union, which I do frequently. But this is what he said: ‘It’ll have to be separate establishments.’

It’s a concession. You must see it. It’s a step… but now I’m thinking – it’s rather like when you hear that some young thing has got an Oxbridge place, ‘Marvellous, but now they’ll have to go there.’

So now I’ll have to marry Lord Arrowby. He’s adorable, of course, and so eligible and suitable… but, oh dear, can I face it?

Enough of this! Here are some pictures of Kai, Mayfair, where I went after ‘The Iron Lady’ with the Multis. They board for India next week for five weeks, two of which are at a health farm where a mud and salt regime is enforced.

If you hear that India has burned down in the near future, you’ll know why.

I shall have to weave as best I can without them.

I put on half a stone after Kai: I’m sure it was because the Blond Multi asked the lady Maitre d’ so many questions, such as where she lives, who the owner is, where he lives, which is the most popular dish on the menu, in addition to ‘No chop-sticks, thank you’ and side-lining of tiled plinth which was pride and joy of Mayfair Chinese styling instead of table-mat, that they cursed.

I haven’t quite finished the Lord Arrowby story, as a matter of fact. When, oh when will he come back from India?