Wednesday 17th June 2026

Just for one moment, after Flavio had re-painted the kitchen cupboards worst affected by being under the sink. The colour is Imperial Chinese Yellow: half a day to go to Papers and Paints in Fulham to buy the paint … before that, in April, Joshua Baring’s paint specialist came. You may remember last summer I tried 14 times to match some floorboards in my kitchen. Finally I gave up, thought it would do. But at the Garden Opening last year, Joshua Baring condemned the new colour.

At least he had a paint specialist in mind. But I thought: no paint specialist will undertake 4 floorboards. On the other hand, money is no object, when it comes to something like that. In one of those crashes of sudden raving to get the home right, I contacted the paint specialist. It was arranged for him to visit. What I hadn’t reckoned with was that he would have little pots of colour about his person. He set to, and within 40 minutes the floor was right. It was done by fiddling about with shading, adding bits of worn through paint by dabbling terracotta on to look like it had worn through.

And nothing to pay! Normally he works for oligarchs … marbling entire mansions for millions… I sensed though that he was deeply sympathetic to somebody who wanted 4 floorboards exactly right.

I’ve been meaning to send a case of champagne in thanks.

The next stage was having the horrible LED downlights removed and replaced with vintage heritage glass coolie shades. Then Flavio, via Royston King, came to stop up the holes where the downlights had been and repaint the kitchen cupboards partially.

When he had finished and I was clearing up, just for one moment, all the strain and worry lifted, all the agony and torment. The home purred, as Sandringham must do, fully maided, teams of maids working round the clock, maintenance staff summoned within minutes, conservation specialists, polishers, re-touchers, gilders… just for one moment, my home was right. Until I saw that some Polyfillering around one of the new light switches was pitted and I was plunged back.

All the same, we do not give up. We fight on, surging ever forward as we lurch always backward.