{"id":577,"date":"2009-10-24T19:00:54","date_gmt":"2009-10-24T18:00:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=577"},"modified":"2009-10-25T18:21:34","modified_gmt":"2009-10-25T18:21:34","slug":"what-to-do-if-your-hotel-disappoints-the-gay-mother-and-adrian-edge-show-great-pluck-in-madrid","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=577","title":{"rendered":"What to do if Your Hotel Disappoints. The Gay Mother and Adrian Edge Show Great Pluck in Madrid"},"content":{"rendered":"

Saturday 24th<\/sup> October 2009<\/p>\n

Where were we? The Gay Mother and I are in Madrid at the Villa Real, 5 stars \u2013 don\u2019t like it. Horrid colour on the walls. Foolish paper flowers on poles (see photo in previous posting). But only 134 euros a night.<\/p>\n

No question of it being the centrepiece of our holiday.<\/p>\n

We\u2019ve been here since Wednesday. How have we filled the void? Don\u2019t worry. Poor Little Rich Gays are nothing if not resourceful, especially when accompanied by a Gay Mother.<\/p>\n

Who, on the first day, looked out of the window, saw it was about to rain and announced a walk. Off we trudge in a gale to a park called The Retiro, the Gay Mother, 85, several times nearly Mary Poppinsified by her 3 euro umbrella, bought earlier in the day. Do you get it?\u00a0 Of course, we don\u2019t like The Retiro because we don\u2019t like gardens in foreign full stop \u2013 dusty vistas, everything in rows, no flowers.<\/p>\n

On the way back from the garden, so-called, what do I see, looming ahead?\u00a0 Yes, the Ritz Hotel, the Madrid Ritz, said to be the best. I\u2019ve mentioned before, I think, that we can see it from our rooms at the Villa Real. \u2018Do you fancy a tea\u2019s cup?\u2019 I say to the Gay Mother. Yes, she does and where do I suggest? \u2018Well, we could try….\u2019 and before she knows it we\u2019re through the door.<\/p>\n

You see, I\u2019m applying the same technique as with the waxed Diesel jeans at H Nicks which were so expensive, but in that case it didn\u2019t work. (I know it\u2019s a loose thread. I haven\u2019t finished the story of the waxed jeans I was in quest of last Saturday. It\u2019s utterly thrilling but you\u2019ll have to wait…). Sample what you haven\u2019t got or can\u2019t have and find fault with it.<\/p>\n

Fortunately the Madrid Ritz did not let down. Moribund, poor service, depressing Palm Court with no windows, gloomy heaps of rococo crap, faintly grubby, cheap pink jackets of the waiters. Only plus a good cup, good china and silverware but I should think so too at 18 euros. Final triumph \u2013 on leaving I looked back at the facade. Replacement windows!<\/p>\n

Wouldn\u2019t have done at all.<\/p>\n

This is what you do if your own hotel fails. Are you following?\u00a0 Do you get my drift? \u00a0That\u2019s it. You fill the time looking at other hotels<\/em>. Anthony Mottram and I once spent days scouring the Los Remedios district of Seville in search of hotels. That was after we\u2019d inspected the 5 star Alphonso XIII (absolutely not: items for sale in glass cases in the lobby). The Los Remedios district was modern and residential, but, you never know, there might have been a glorious hotel lurking.<\/p>\n

In that case we aspired to move. The 2-star we were in was impossible. Finally, finally we got into the Alabardero, whose radiance we had yearned for the minute we arrived in Seville.<\/p>\n

The Gay Mother, at 85, has less appetite for hotel warfare. We will be staying put. Hotels have therefore taken up less time than is desirable. No inspecting of other hotel rooms, always a pleasant past-time whether you intend moving or not, no haggling, Anthony Mottram style, over prices – when re-hoteling you have the great advantage of being on the spot.<\/p>\n

We\u2019ve had to branch out in other directions, including, would you believe it, sight-seeing.<\/p>\n

But just round the corner is the Hotel Urban. I\u2019ve located it but not been in. My friend, Mrs Solomon Bung of California, stayed there. I fear it might be better. But it is the sister hotel of this one. We could have gone there for the same price, you know.<\/p>\n

\"Consoling

Consoling Vulgarity at the Ritz, Madrid<\/p><\/div>\n

\"Things

Things Could be Worse: a 3-star Garage-Hotel in Madrid<\/p><\/div>\n

\"Good

Good Silver Tea Pot at the Madrid Ritz<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Saturday 24th October 2009 Where were we? The Gay Mother and I are in Madrid at the Villa Real, 5 stars \u2013 don\u2019t like it. Horrid colour on the walls. Foolish paper flowers on poles (see photo in previous posting). But only 134 euros a night. No question of it being the centrepiece of our […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-577","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adrain-edge"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=577"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":580,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577\/revisions\/580"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=577"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=577"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=577"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}