{"id":552,"date":"2009-10-23T20:05:12","date_gmt":"2009-10-23T19:05:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=552"},"modified":"2009-10-24T06:50:31","modified_gmt":"2009-10-24T05:50:31","slug":"at-last-my-madrid-hotel-full-story-and-i-share-my-secret","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=552","title":{"rendered":"At Last !  &#8211; My Madrid Hotel: Full Story and I Share My&nbsp;Secret"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div id=\"attachment_559\" style=\"width: 572px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-559\" class=\"size-large wp-image-559\" title=\"004\" src=\"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0041-562x750.jpg\" alt=\"Styling of Bathrobes not Seen Before by Me: Good Point\" width=\"562\" height=\"750\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0041-562x750.jpg 562w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0041-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0041.JPG 1200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 562px) 100vw, 562px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-559\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Styling of Bathrobes not Seen Before by Me: Good Point<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">Friday 23<sup>rd<\/sup> October 2009<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>\u00a0It\u2019s disgraceful. I\u2019ve been at the Hotel Villa Real, Madrid for two days. But we haven\u2019t had criticism of the hotel. As you know, hotels are the throbbing heart of Poor Little Rich Gay life. They are any holiday\u2019s main object; we like our homes to resemble hotels. Anthony Mottram\u2019s museum-sized apartment in Prague has a hotel bedroom and bathroom within it. Smallmeal\u2019s former London home was often assumed to be a hotel.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0If you\u2019re wondering what I mean by \u2018hotel\u2019, remember Mrs Solomon Bung of California\u2019s great saying: \u2018Four Stars \u2013 hell. Five Stars \u2013 heaven\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>It follows naturally that\u00a0criticism of the hotel is a highly developed skill of PLRGs. I\u2019ve already mentioned, this Villa Real is awfully brown. When we arrived, the Gay Mother said, \u2018You have that room, it\u2019s more masculine.\u2019(A bit much, as a remark, don\u2019t you think?) But the only difference was that\u00a0the brown bedspread in the supposedly more feminine room was temporarily absent. The next day she said, not with enthusiasm, \u2018I\u2019ve got a brown bedspread now.\u2019<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0We\u2019ve got luxury wood flooring, walnut veneer furniture, a balustrade and steps down to the sitting area, red-brown leather sofa, dirty yellow rag-rolled walls, two splurgy paintings and three paper flowers sprouting out of poles about 5 foot high.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0It\u2019s 5 star, you know.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0But really it might as well be my father\u2019s office in the 1960s and that was old-fashioned then. He was a provincial solicitor \u2013 walls mushroom and woodwork choc gloss. Lino floor.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s drab.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0I picked up one of the wooden coat hangers and it dropped to pieces in my hands \u2013 wretched thing made of balsa wood and ineptly nailed together.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0But it\u2019s 5 star.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Now the bathroom I\u2019ve got more time for. The ideal hotel bathroom should be as if hewn from a solid block of marble. This has that feeling but look \u2013 I\u2019ll let the pictures speak for themselves. Crud around the bath, staining of the marble, the floor tiles not aligned with the wall tiles (what would Bruce MacBain say?)<\/p>\n<p>How could\u00a0we build our holiday around a hotel like this?\u00a0 On the other hand, (you\u2019ll be astonished, I know), the Gay Mother and I have struck lucky, we have been blessed. This is my secret. I\u2019ve had good fortune like this before. At the Hotel Raphael in Rome where the wires were sticking out of the shaving socket. You see, this Hotel Villa Real in Madrid (5 stars), it\u2019s due for refurb, isn\u2019t it? It\u2019s delap, it\u2019s had its day.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0You know what that means, don\u2019t you?<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0Yes!\u00a0 Prices are slashed. We\u2019re only paying 135 euros a night each (you get what you pay for, as the Multis would say).<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0But it\u2019s still 5 star. Who can deny it?<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0So this is what you must do. Find a 5 star on its last legs and pile in.<\/p>\n<p>Just one\u00a0question: if the hotel was not to be our main occupation,\u00a0how were we to pass the time? What on earth have we been doing in Madrid since Wednesday? Could there have been <em>sightseeing<\/em>? If you can wait until tomorrow, I\u2019ll tell you.<\/p>\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div id=\"attachment_554\" style=\"width: 572px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-554\" class=\"size-large wp-image-554\" title=\"007\" src=\"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0071-562x750.jpg\" alt=\"Incorrect Tiling Module: What Would Bruce MacBain Say?\" width=\"562\" height=\"750\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0071-562x750.jpg 562w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0071-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0071.JPG 1200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 562px) 100vw, 562px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-554\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Incorrect Tiling Module: What Would Bruce MacBain Say?<\/p><\/div>\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div id=\"attachment_555\" style=\"width: 572px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-555\" class=\"size-large wp-image-555\" title=\"005\" src=\"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0051-562x750.jpg\" alt=\"Stained Marble in the Bathroom \" width=\"562\" height=\"750\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0051-562x750.jpg 562w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0051-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0051.JPG 1200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 562px) 100vw, 562px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-555\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Stained Marble in the Bathroom <\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div id=\"attachment_557\" style=\"width: 572px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-557\" class=\"size-large wp-image-557\" title=\"006\" src=\"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0061-562x750.jpg\" alt=\"5-star Bathroom Crud\" width=\"562\" height=\"750\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0061-562x750.jpg 562w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0061-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0061.JPG 1200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 562px) 100vw, 562px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-557\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">5-star Bathroom Crud<\/p><\/div>\n<div class=\"mceTemp\">\n<div id=\"attachment_558\" style=\"width: 572px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-558\" class=\"size-large wp-image-558\" title=\"001\" src=\"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0012-562x750.jpg\" alt=\"Three Paper Flowers in Vase in Hotel Room\" width=\"562\" height=\"750\" srcset=\"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0012-562x750.jpg 562w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0012-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/0012.JPG 1200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 562px) 100vw, 562px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-558\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Three Paper Flowers in Vase in Hotel Room<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Friday 23rd October 2009 \u00a0It\u2019s disgraceful. I\u2019ve been at the Hotel Villa Real, Madrid for two days. But we haven\u2019t had criticism of the hotel. As you know, hotels are the throbbing heart of Poor Little Rich Gay life. They are any holiday\u2019s main object; we like our homes to resemble hotels. Anthony Mottram\u2019s museum-sized [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-552","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adrain-edge"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/552","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=552"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/552\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":560,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/552\/revisions\/560"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=552"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=552"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=552"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}