{"id":2472,"date":"2011-07-28T16:01:28","date_gmt":"2011-07-28T15:01:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=2472"},"modified":"2011-07-28T16:01:28","modified_gmt":"2011-07-28T15:01:28","slug":"i-gain-normandy-but-bruce-macbain%e2%80%99s-curtain-agony-overhangs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=2472","title":{"rendered":"I Gain Normandy But Bruce MacBain\u2019s Curtain Agony Overhangs"},"content":{"rendered":"

Thursday 28th July 2011<\/p>\n

(Could not post yesterday owing to rural lack of WiFi in Normandy: but today have met Maxence qui est un tres jeune entrepreneur with WiFi and no pants apparently)<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t often mention my new car. On Tuesday its Xenon driving lights forged through to Normandy. I said to Esm\u00e9 Manning, the actress, who was with: \u2018I\u2019ll see people clocking as we disgorge from this vehicle on the car deck. They\u2019ll be thinking with some loathing: \u201cSerious car, another, better, dream life.\u201d She said: \u2018Real class is in the Eurotunnel not on this rotting hulk by P & O.\u2019<\/p>\n

Oh terrible false economy to save \u00a390.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re seething with events. In Normandy is the summer home of the Straight branch of the Poor Little Rich Gays. How they\u2019re coming on! Ivy Driver, the daughter, is tending strongly to complex dining at only 15. She\u2019s got a gay friend! Matt Driver, the husband, is up a step-ladder despite a salary exceeding Smallmeal\u2019s (head of landfill in this country or whatever). Then there\u2019s Esm\u00e9\u2019s crise financial. <\/em>\u2018But you\u2019re in the top 5% I keep telling her.\u2019 \u2018Well, I pity the other 95,\u2019 she says. Her eyebrow threading bill is ruinous. She\u2019ll have to go back on the stage. She couldn\u2019t get the vast plastic-slab of a price tag (\u00a31.99) off her Pound Stretcher glasses. It was plainly intended as a punishment for the reduced price.<\/p>\n

So much to tell: I\u2019m rather wondering whether Kelm Driver, the son, might be able to help me with my little plans. It\u2019s a question of who he might know at Art School.<\/p>\n

But it\u2019ll have to wait because Bruce MacBain\u2019s curtain agony screams to be heard: he\u2019s my private architect. Laura Malcolm\u2019s too and architect to all the Poor Little Rich Gays. Laura is the wife of Matt Driver, who is in global charge of finding out the deep, buried reasons for our product choices,\u00a0 the aim being to massively up sales in general. Rather not us, others. At work he ponders certain products with such brilliance that he can afford not to buy them himself.<\/p>\n

Bruce MacBain has been five years choosing a curtain to cover his disused front door which, after total reconfiguring of his 18th<\/sup> century terraced home, is now\u00a0 in the corner of his \u2018living area\u2019. He made his home side-loading. You enter through a side wall. Three years ago I ordered him to select an excellent lilac, heather-mixture silk\/linen of which he had a sample ( it was client’s revenge). \u2018That\u2019s the one. I want it up in three weeks.\u2019 It wasn\u2019t. Some more samples appeared and lay about. Finally, finally, this May it was announced that the curtain was underway. A heavy silk\/linen in old gold had been selected at \u00a3150 a metre. Tancredo Viamare, Bruce MacBain\u2019s non-resident partner (or byf, as we used to say), spent three hours discussing, with the maker, the size of ring to be inserted into the fabric so the curtain could be threaded into a pole. Do you know that look?<\/p>\n

In June the curtain arrived and was installed.<\/p>\n

The curtain maker had gained little from the three-hour conference. The rings are the wrong size. Far too big. In the meantime, Bruce has taken against rings altogether. He wants a rare curtain tape, very wide, which gives pleats every 6 inches.<\/p>\n

The top will have to be chopped off the curtain. Luckily he\u2019s got some spare fabric to compensate. All the same, the agony.<\/p>\n

\"Bruce

Bruce MacBain's Curtain: All Wrong<\/p><\/div>\n

\"Bruce

Bruce MacBain's Wrong Rings: In Fact I Recall a Line from Hardy Very Right for PLRGs '...Love\/ Wrings with Wrong...' Prob. Misquoted Slightly<\/p><\/div>\n

\"Esme

Esme Manning's Pound Stretcher Specs with Punititive Irremoveable Label Recalling the Scarlet Letter or the Placard Helen Burns was Forced to Wear in 'Jane Eyre'<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Thursday 28th July 2011 (Could not post yesterday owing to rural lack of WiFi in Normandy: but today have met Maxence qui est un tres jeune entrepreneur with WiFi and no pants apparently) I don\u2019t often mention my new car. On Tuesday its Xenon driving lights forged through to Normandy. I said to Esm\u00e9 Manning, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2472","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adrain-edge"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2472","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2472"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2472\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2477,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2472\/revisions\/2477"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2472"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2472"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2472"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}