{"id":2071,"date":"2011-03-16T19:26:50","date_gmt":"2011-03-16T19:26:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=2071"},"modified":"2011-03-16T19:26:50","modified_gmt":"2011-03-16T19:26:50","slug":"how-to-give-a-talk-the-poor-little-rich-gay-way","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/?p=2071","title":{"rendered":"How to Give a Talk the Poor Little Rich Gay&nbsp;Way"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Wednesday 16<sup>th<\/sup> March 2011<\/p>\n<p>It occurs to me after my experience of addressing Ashringford Cathedral on Friday that Poor Little Rich Gays are often called upon to give talks. Ordinary members of the public reel in horror at nearly everything else to do with us, but they love our talks \u2013 the hypocrites.<\/p>\n<p>Then I recalled that Royston Buster, one of our great Committee\/Chairperson\/Wheeler-dealer Poor Little Rich Gays, gave a talk not a month ago to the Garden History Society about the less well-known parks and forests of London over which he wields huge influence. The audience was mostly grey woollies with knapsacks and hiking boots (well, not quite).<\/p>\n<p>So here\u2019s how to give a talk the Poor Little Rich Gay Way:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Veer alarmingly between high brainy style and baby talk, with, if possible non-grammar: \u2018Investment in the regeneration of one forgotten London park by the Heritage Lottery Fund has a sussuration throughout all the neglected green spaces of the capital, whether we donate or not.\u2019 Then: \u2018They\u2019ve done dendrology on that tree trunk&#8230;.\u2019 \u2018They put deer in front of this hunting lodge so Queen Elizabeth could ping at them with her bow and arrow.\u2019 This use of \u2018they\u2019 is delightful and will make you sound normal to the audience. Also refer often to \u2018my favourite&#8230;\u2019 as it \u2018my favourite herbaceous border\u2019 \u2018my favourite garden ornament &#8230;\u2019<\/li>\n<li>Bring in Her Present Majesty at unlikely moments: \u2018From the top of Richmond Hill you can see if <em>she\u2019s<\/em> in residence at Windsor with her flag flying.\u2019<\/li>\n<li>Have a bizarre drink with you, in this case a self-made sloe wine<\/li>\n<li>Name-dropping, of course.\u00a0 Dan &#8230;(slight pause).. Pearson, Molly&#8230;Salisbury&#8230;Lucinda&#8230;Lambton<\/li>\n<li>Hint at wild, illegitimate life beyond the ken of the audience: drunken cycling along the canal tow path. Gardens have same effect as sex (they\u2019ve done research); if you\u2019ve done it once, you want to do it again&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>Show pictures of self opening an environmental car park: solemn Mayor standing by with gold chain, self bent double and spinning out of orbit, helpless with laughter. Don\u2019t explain but begin shrieking in the same manner.<\/li>\n<li>How to end talk about public green spaces of London: \u2018This is a picture of a lupin in my own garden. I think it\u2019s the best really.\u2019 Roar with laughter and stagger about as great gale of applause engulfs&#8230;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Wednesday 16th March 2011 It occurs to me after my experience of addressing Ashringford Cathedral on Friday that Poor Little Rich Gays are often called upon to give talks. Ordinary members of the public reel in horror at nearly everything else to do with us, but they love our talks \u2013 the hypocrites. Then I [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2071","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adrain-edge"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2071"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2072,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071\/revisions\/2072"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2071"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2071"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/poorlittlerichgays.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2071"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}